Sorry for last post. It was supremely shitty, and I am considering taking it down. Not the recipe, though. Because that was a boss recipe.
Blame it on the writing. From my limited experience so far in the craft, writing a book is sort of like running a marathon—and my dad, who actually ran a marathon once, would probably agree.
I can’t tell you what lies behind that wall, because I haven’t gotten there yet.
But still, like every aspiring author, I dream of the world beyond. I have already gone through many internal debates—do I want to self-publish to keep total control over my intellectual rights and other aspects of the game; or do I want to gamble my precious novel, my baby, on a profit-driven corporation’s publishing services? I’ve thought about what contests I might enter, who I would ask to review my book, how I would create an author website, and so on and so forth.
These thoughts are distracting and unnecessary. Tragically, it turns out there is no benefit to wondering if Oprah would like your book. You just have to plant ass in chair and write.
If only it was that easy.
|Bacon optional. source|
Even worse, the Great and Powerful Force of Science tells us that willpower is a limited resource. As this Wired article explains, expending our willpower on one strenuous goal may deplete our ability to forge through and complete another goal—the example given being a trip to the gym after a long, hard day at work. It’s enough to make your knees shake, especially when you’re facing ten-hour school days (not counting homework) after a long and lazy summer. How can you possibly have the willpower to write a book when it’s eleven o’clock at night and all you want to do is sleep?
(Side note: when I say ten-hour school days, I’m not joking. Apparently fancy private schools like to run their students into the ground, South Korea-style. Maybe so they don’t have the energy to ask for BMWs after they get their driver’s licenses?)
You can see my problem here. And no, my problem is not that I won’t shut the fuck up about how hard writing a book is. This isn’t the Fight Club. Hmmph. *shuffles away* *whines in a corner*
|That's some damn good acting. source|
In the meantime, I can continue procrastibaking.
Seeing as the summer is almost over, I have some regrets that I have not made as many no-bake cheesecakes (zero) or ice cream recipes (one) as I would desire. Of course, I have some excuses—lack of ingredients, lack of opportunities (i.e. my Mom doesn’t think we need a cheesecake when obviously we do), inherent laziness...but there’s nothing that can be done.
So here’s another quick bread recipe.
|Quick muffin, that is.|
This particular variation is not as sweet as you would typically expect from Baby June—the flavor straddles the bridge between sweet and savory, one could say, with naturally sweet corn and a bit of added sugar alongside jalapeno and onion. The end result of perfect. Perfect for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Tastes amazing when fried up with a bit of coconut oil. Mmmm yeah. Come to mama.
|What does that even mean?|
Okay. I’m done talking. Here is the recipe:
Vegan jalapeno corn muffins
Adapted from Cooking Light
18 grams • ground flaxseed • 2 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons
305 grams • nondairy milk • 1 ¼ cups
15 grams • lemon juice or apple cider vinegar • 1 tablespoon
42 grams • coconut oil • 3 tablespoons
160 grams • sweet onion, chopped • 1 cup
6 grams • fresh garlic, minced • 2 cloves
166 grams • fresh corn • 1 cup
8 grams • jalapeno, minced • 2 teaspoons
125 grams • all-purpose flour • 1 cup
50 grams • granulated sugar • ¼ cup
4 grams • baking powder • 1 teaspoon
2 grams • baking soda • ½ teaspoon
2 grams • chili powder • ½ teaspoon
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Grease about 15 muffin tins and set aside.
In a small bowl, whisk together flaxseed and ¼ cup plus 3 tablespoons water. Combine nondairy milk and lemon juice / vinegar in another bowl.
In a large nonstick skillet, melt 13 grams / 1 tablespoon coconut oil. Add onions and garlic and cook for about a minute. Add corn and jalapeno and cook for another two minutes. Remove from heat and stir in the remaining coconut oil.
In a large bowl, whisk together all-purpose flour, granulated sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and chili powder. In a medium bowl, combine corn-onion mixture, milk mixture, and flax “egg”; then fold into flour mixture just until combined.
Divide batter evenly between 15 muffin tins. Bake for about 20 minutes. Let cool for five minutes before transferring to a wire rack. Munch.
|Two lonely muffins. I need to put them out of their misery.|
And just remember: if you’re trying to get something real important done, you’ve got to save up that willpower...so you might as well dive in and eat those muffins.
It’s for the best.