Vegan cannoli crepes

I’mma keep this short and sweet today—partly because, um, that NaNoWriMo thing, and partly because this recipe is actually filled with sugar, as you should expect from someone like me.

Combining desserts with breakfast food is, in my humble opinion, one of the most awesomely ‘Murican things that you can do in the kitchen. I should know. You’re talking to the resident expert on getting a sugar high before you’ve even made a cup of coffee. So naturally, in honor of this tradition, I’ve put together a little list of shit I’ve made that combines the two best meals of the day: breakfast and dessert. Here ya go, grasshopper.

My photography has improved since then. I think.

First off: mint chocolate chip pancakes. First recipe I ever posted on this little corner of the internet. Ah, to think of the innocence of a young food blogger!

In a Guinness glass, no less!

Here you shall find a pudding-like oat mush filled with banana and chocolate and peanut butter and c’mon you know you want it, as unappetizing as it may seem. Pictures aren’t everything.

Christina Tosi would be proud.

Okay, this is where the dessert-for-breakfast thing gets hardcore. Funfetti cake...in a nice little stack of pancakes. Yes. I went there. Pretty fucking delicious too.

Don't mind me, just smearing pudding all over my breakfast.

Now you see these glorious Boston cream pie pancakes. They’re much, much healthier than the actual thing, I assure you. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.

God, I just love cutting open a stack of pancakes and spearing them with my fork for the sake of a photo.

Tiramisu for breakfast? Don’t mind if I do.

DAT PUMPKIN PIE DOE

This French toast? Every pumpkin pie-lover’s dream. This is second to straight-up pie for breakfast, swear to god.

Oh, and one more. 

Yes.

Okay folks. This is it. This is probably the worst breakfast I will ever make. It was absolutely, jaw-droppingly horrible. Even my mom chastised me when she found me plopping balls of raw cookie dough into my pancake batter. And you know what? She was right to do so. But that doesn’t mean shit when you consider the fact that it is now my most-viewed and most-pinned post and was actually accepted to Foodgawker—a rare occurrence for a photographer as awful as myself—and favorite 100-some times, no joke. People know. They recognize the awfulness, and they embrace it.

And so we must.

Today I bring you something similar. Pancakes, but crepes. Chocolate chip mushy filling, but with more of a ricotta, cream-cheese-esque flavor. Cannoli, naturally. I don’t know shit about authentic cannoli, but I do know that the sweet, creamy filling is always the best part.

So why not highlight that in a breakfast?

Why not indeed?

I know, I know—it’s not the most sightly thing ever, but hear me out. I was rushed, see. Didn’t want my crepes to get cold, so I just folded them how I always do—into quarters—and snapped a few photos, hoping that my haphazard sprinkling of powdered sugar would be sufficient. And yeah...um...it kinda wasn’t.

But that’s okay. Because where there are pancakes, there is peace.

Here’s the recipe.

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Vegan cannoli crepes

Ingredients

Crepe batter (adapted from this crepe cake)

122 grams • nondairy milk • ½ cup

170 grams • water • 2/3 cup

56 grams • nondairy margarine, melted • ¼ cup

125 grams • all-purpose flour • 1 cup

2 grams • salt • ¼ teaspoon

12 grams • granulated sugar • 1 tablespoon

Filling (adapted from Vedged Out)

140 grams • cashews, soaked for 2 to 4 hours and drained • 1 cup

45 grams • fresh lemon juice • 3 tablespoons

45 grams • water • 3 tablespoons

4 grams • vanilla extract • 1 teaspoon

32 grams • powdered sugar (plus extra for garnish) • ¼ cup

Chocolate chips to taste

Instructions

Place all ingredients in a blender and pulse about ten times until smooth. Place in a bowl and refrigerate for 30 minutes.

To make filling, place cashews, lemon juice, and water in a food processor and blend until as smooth as possible. Add powdered sugar (adjusting to taste) and blend once more. Transfer to a small bowl and fold in a few handfuls of chocolate chips. Set filling aside until needed.

When batter is ready, preheat a frying pan just until smoking. Remove from heat and add two to three tablespoons of batter; swirl pan around to coat. Cook on medium-low heat until each side is golden brown, about 30 seconds each. Repeat with remaining batter. Set crepes aside to cool completely.

To finish, simply fill the crepes with the cannoli filling. Sprinkle extra chocolate chips and powdered sugar on top as garnish. Homph gomph away.

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I have no shame.

Really, this breakfast is your opportunity to load up on chocolate chips while purporting to replicate a delicate Italian dessert. This kind of chance doesn’t pop up every day. Best take advantage.

Especially when there’s writing to be done.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO source