Okay y’all. This is it. This is the last goddamn zucchini recipe you’re going to see on the blog this season. I might even whip up another batch of zucchini-infused awesomeness with the shredded zucchini we’ve frozen for the cooler seasons, but I swear to god it shall not be posted until the squash returns next year.
|Please excuse the awful photo.|
A classic zucchini bread recipe. Probably the only one you’ll ever need, besides the million others posted on this here blog.
|Ah! Another example of sublimely horrible photography.|
A savory dish to assist in your summer squash consumption.
Here you will see some mini cakes with a not-so-mini zucchini specimen in the background.
|That lavender sprig at the bottom was photoshopped in, if you can't tell.|
|Drowning in a pool of syrup, as they should be.|
Zucchini and olive oil for breakfast? Yup, that’s salad.
|Like my sprinkle of coconut? Eh?|
These cupcakes were, like, mad good. So fudgy and coconut-y and not at all zucchini-y.
|Ah, those cupcakes were good times.|
I don’t know what kind of drugs I was on when I made those cupcakes. But they were really fucking good, so there’s that.
|Yo. This picture got accepted to Foodgawker. Bow down.|
Chocolate cake for breakfast = Baby June’s favorite kind of breakfast.
Okay bitches, that’s it. Now let’s take a look at this shiny new zucchini bread recipe.
As for regular old zucchini loaves, we have plain, we have chocolate, and now we have peanut butter. What more do you need? Chocolate and peanut butter in the same loaf?
Actually, we do need that. But I digress.
So, a little about this recipe. You may be aware that those store-bought peanut butter chips are a) totally non-vegan and b) totally fake. This is a problem, as the recipe I had my sights on called for a whopping 1 ½ cups of peanut butter chips. But as it turns out, it is possible to recreate those peanut butter chips at home using basic ingredients and forgoing the dairy products. What now? Well, you make homemade peanut butter chips. That’s what you do now. Then you freeze them, and then you put them in homemade peanut butter zucchini bread, and then you eat as much of the bread as you can before going into a carb-o-coma all while laughing at poor ol’ Nestle who had hoped to wring a few bucks out of you for those shitty faux-nut butter chips. LOL. Instant hilarity.
I know there are other versions of homemade PB chips out there, but since I did not have coconut oil on hand I decided to use this decidedly less-healthy powdered sugar-filled version. Oh well. It’s not like this was ever going to be health food anyway.
The end result? It’s fabulous. Takes like cake, actually. The bread has this wonderful tender crumb and lots of that stick-to-the-roof-of-your-mouth peanut butter flavor (arachibutyrophobia* sufferers, I am sorry). Bonus points for smearing jam all over it to make the world’s greatest PB&J.
Here’s how you do it.
Peanut butter zucchini bread
Adapted from Tastes of Lizzy T
Makes two loaves
120 grams • creamy peanut butter • ¾ cup
56 grams • vegetable oil of choice • ¼ cup
400 grams • granulated sugar • 2 cups
8 grams • vanilla extract • 2 teaspoons
180 grams • silken tofu, blended until smooth • ¾ cup
380 grams • shredded zucchini • 2 cups
375 grams • all-purpose flour • 3 cups
6 grams • salt • 1 teaspoon
4 grams • baking powder • 1 teaspoon
4 grams • baking soda • 1 teaspoon
1 recipe peanut butter baking chips (see below)
Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Grease two loaf pans and set aside.
In a large bowl, whisk together peanut butter, oil, granulated sugar, vanilla, and tofu until smooth. Whisk in zucchini until evenly distributed. Dump all-purpose flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda on top and fold in just until combined. Fold in peanut butter chips.
Divide batter evenly between two pans. Bake for about 65 minutes or until a toothpick inserted comes out with moist crumbs attached. Let cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans, then cool for 30 minutes before slicing (LOL right).
Homemade peanut butter chips
80 grams • creamy peanut butter • ½ cup
30 grams • powdered sugar • ¼ cup
30 grams • milk • 2 tablespoons
8 grams • vanilla extract • 2 teaspoons
Whisk all ingredients until smooth. Pipe onto a baking sheet in little dots. Freeze until hard, then measure out 1 ½ cups for the above recipe. You can use these for other things too, of course.
|It's coming for you.|
Oh, and you know how I said you should totes smear jam all over this thing? Well, last night I had one of those medication-induced ridiculously-vivid dreams where I absolutely slathered jam all over a piece of this bread. And it was a huge layer of jam. Scarily huge. I was desperately picking jam off of my bread but it just kept piling on and on and on. Frightening stuff, that is.
Any dream-readers out there who can help? Because I’m still confused.
* Arachibutyrophobia is fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth.**
|That knowledge feel. source|
** It’s actually a joke.